Why the “Me” in “I’m doing this for me” is Key — By Dr. Laura Triplett

Him.  Her.  Them.  Us.   Most people are motivated to change who they are for someone else.  And that’s just not right.  Ever decreasingly, the phrase “I’m doing this for me” is uttered and when it is, it is often said with guilt, insincerity, and irritation.  Guilt for daring to be “selfish” enough to take the time to do something for yourself; insincerity because you know that this urge to change came from an external rather than an internal need; and irritation from being put in a situation where change is a requirement to fulfill someone or something’s expectations.

So, what’s wrong with saying what you mean and meaning what you say when it comes to proclaiming, “I’m doing this for me?”  Absolutely nothing.  In fact, when we actually do something for ourselves we become better people.  Any effort that is made under the auspices of bettering yourself because you genuinely want to be better is like a gift to humankind.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful if our society was one comprised of people who better themselves — becoming the people they truly want to be – because it is their desire to do so and not just a response to what others think they should do?

When you talk about personal change, any endeavor that you want to be successful has to begin with the phrase, “I’m doing this for me.”  Because if you’re doing it for any other person or worse, because you think it’s what society expects of you, then the journey becomes a fight and success, an infinite burden.  But when you really want to do something — and you do it because the very thought of it makes you desperate with anticipation and excitement — then you know you’re truly doing it for yourself.

Physical change doesn’t come easy, but the difficulty of it is made ever so sweeter when you remember “I’m doing this for me.”